We Have Salad For You!

We Have Salad For You!

I can sum up how I feel about picnics, or as they are aptly known today, “cook-outs,” in two words: Bah humbug!  There is no easy way to cope with the issues my head has at these types of gatherings. 

Funny how we hardly use the word picnic anymore; “picnic” makes us think of exercise and playing outdoors.  Today, it is all about cookouts, gigantic grills, 100 different ways to marinate the meat and who shows up with the best dessert. 

When I was a young girl, the Hibachi grill held just the right amount of meat for our family of 4.  If we ventured to Owasco Lake for a picnic, we brought either hamburgers or hotdogs, never both.  One family showed up with potato salad, someone else brought baked beans, and my uncles carried a couple of watermelons on their shoulders.  The big event was swimming in the lake; not the food. It is difficult to understand how that simple outing has evolved into the lavish food festival it has now become.

 The typical fare of a cook-out today offers hamburgers, hot dogs, chicken, sausage, ribs and beef.   There are at least 3 different kinds of pasta salads, along with potato salad, baked beans, corn on the cob, salt potatoes, a pound of melted butter (calling to me by name,) a variety of rolls to accompany the different meats, endless sauces and condiments,  and I haven’t even mentioned the appetizers or desserts.  It is definitely sensory overload for my addictive personality.

Socialization is an important part of survival today.  However, there is no worthwhile socialization coming from any part of me when I am facing that many calories, choices, smells and visual affidavits of people nodding in agreement with their mouths too stuffed to answer, that what they are consuming is delicious.  In the quiet corners of my mind, I will often ask myself, “Where did I go wrong that I can’t eat that food too?”  Make no mistake about it, I did eat that food, and I ate it for years, and that is why I am in the mess I am in coping with it all today.

The problem is not that I can’t eat those foods, I can, but I know what a portion size is, and it is difficult to eat a single piece of meat when everyone else has a plate heaped with at least 3 different kinds on theirs.  If 1/3 of a cup of a mayonnaise type salad is a serving size, how many teaspoons can I put on my plate from the many offered (because I want them all) to stay within that limit?  If I eat the mayonnaise-based salad, should I skip the butter on the corn?  If I have a roll with my hamburger, should I eat salt potatoes too?   Since I skipped the butter on the corn, can I put the butter on the salt potatoes? On and on my thoughts go, as I cope with an extremely stressful situation for my addiction. 

The fact that I do not have a good track record for controlling myself around food leads me to believe I should have offered yet another lame excuse and not gotten myself into the situation to begin with.  It is almost impossible for me to resist most of the food at a cookout.   It takes all of my willpower to make healthy choices and watch everyone else eat all the foods I want, and keep a smile on my face.

An invitation to a cookout puts me in a challenging situation.  Not that everyone should be forced to eat grilled fish and vegetables because that is what I want, but telling me,   “We have salad for you,” is not what I want to hear, nor is it a solution to what I am feeling.   I had to lose over 200 pounds to admit that I do not belong at cookouts; so go ahead and eat without me.  I will be walking at Beaver Lake and I won’t even know what I am missing.